Boston…I’m Begging You! Stop This Nonsense From Happening.
By Frank Rekas
Today’s music choice is Bones by The Killers.
With the Stanley Cup Final coming to a crucial game 6 in Boston Monday night, the Bruins are now facing a must win situation in order to force an anything can happen game 7 in Vancouver on Wednesday night. I had begun this final with some pshycho bable that I wasn’t rooting for anyone to win, but that I wanted the Vancouver Canucks to lose. While I still want the Canuckleheads to lose more than I want Boston to win, I have found myself in a very awkward and desperate position. As much as it hurts to say I need the Bruins to win game 6, thus forcing a game 7. Of which I’ll need them to win that one too. Otherwise, this will be the “summer of my discontent”.
See, if the Canucks win I will be miserable all summer, and most of next season since I’m going to have to hear about how Vancouver ended their 40 year drought, how they answered to all the critics, how Bobby Lose actually won the big one, and what a great pair of sisters those twins are. Having to watch commercial highlights for the next 365 days, hearing the words defending Stanley Cup champion…blah, blah, blah. I’m throwing up as I type this. Well I have one word on all that, and it’s one that pretty much will epitomize the post season of 2011 for me: Balderdash!
The word is of medieval Latin origin, and why and how I’ve come to use it won’t matter to most of you, but for me if you look up the definition, it fits. Look also at the words it rhymes with: diaper rash, mountain ash, petty cash, and of course succotash. The last thing I want is Vancouver to win the Stanley Cup, so in order for Boston to prevent this nonsense (use of the word) from happening, I’m begging you to win Monday night. And when you do, I’ll be begging again on Wednesday.
I’ve already eaten a shoe after the Canucks advanced past Nashville. My theory of the Ex-Panther Factor is on the verge of extinction, and having to burn any t-shirt I have from my many trips to British Columbia is potentially about to come to reality. I need the Bruins to stop this from happening.
The Boston Bruins team that we all saw in the first two games was nothing like the team we saw in games 3 and 4, but the same can be said of Vancouver. As each team has proven that there is an advantage to playing on home ice. However, Boston has not been outplayed by very much in the three games that they’ve lost. One of which was with 18 seconds left, and the other was into overtime. They can thank Tim Thomas for that. The Bruins have proven that they can score when they play the style of game that they are capable of. For godsakes 12 goals in two completely dominating games is all you need to realize to admit that. However in the games that they’ve lost, Vancouver has found a way to shut them down, “sell some penalties”, and as they displayed in game 5, out hit the Bruins. And for once they did it without killing anyone.
The Bruins however have to pressure Bobby Lose more than they have in the three loses. Also, a very quick start to game 6 will make a huge difference, as game 5 seemed to make me think the Bruins were jet lagged. Slow starts have doomed the loser in this series as the team that has scored first is 4-0. In addition the team winning Games 1-2 at home and losing Games 3-4 on the road has a series record of 8-2 in the Stanley Cup Final and a Game 5 record of 10-0. That game 5 record makes me uncomfortable. But again, I must add that Vancouver has not been that dominating in any one game. The Bruins have been. And they’ve done it twice in a row. Maybe Friday night was just an off night.
While the Twins, or as Mike Milbury refers to them, Thelma and Louise have been invisible, yes that’s right invisible since they have a whopping three points between them, the Canucks have found a way to muster up a way to win three games. Balderdash. They’ve won these games against a goaltender that is more consistent and better than theirs. Yes I said it. And that’s not Baldersash. Thomas has been exceptional, and steady. He’s been challenged more by the Canucks offense, whereas Boston hasn’t quite tested Luongo with similar pressure. If not for Tim Thomas, Boston would have been eliminated from the playoffs a long time ago, if they even would have made it. When looking at both of these teams, and I am being objective here ( sorta), Boston really has been the better team. I mean after five games the Canucks have six goals and are leading the series three games to two? Balderdash!
We haven’t even begun to talk about the “acting” and dramatic penalties that Vancouver has tried to draw. Some of which have gone their way causing me to think who is more foolish looking? The player(s) doing the diving, or the officials for calling it? That doubling over by Max Lapierre in game five? Balderdash. The Conn Smythe winner if Vancouver wins? Bobby Lose? Balderdash. Give it to Tim Thomas unless he’s blown to shreds. Can’t think of any forward or defenseman other than maybe Ryan Kes&(&*&^&^%^T^r ( can’t say it) from Vancouver that has a chance to win it.
With two games to go, and Vancouver one victory away from winning it all, I almost feel like a horse with a broken leg. If Boston doesn’t win, sure I can live, but I’m not going to be of any use to anyone. So just go ahead and shoot me. Put me out of my misery. I have potentially a maximum of 120 minutes of hockey to watch, barring any overtime. I won’t be pleased with any other outcome than Vancouver losing. Will I watch the handshake? The Trophy presentation? The dressing room celebration? You know the answer to that.
You’re probably thinking “what a bitter man”. To that I say, “Balderdash”. I just can’t fathom putting up with Canuck nonsense for 365 days.
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