I Got Nothin'!

You all remember Seinfeld don’t you?  A show about a group of friends and their everyday life escapades, embarrassments, and tomfoolery?  A show basically about…nothing.

Well, in a similar sort of way, that’s what we have here.  Nothing.  As in nothing’s going on with our Florida Panthers.

How similar to Seinfeld are we?  While I’m not yet prepared to compare charachters of the show to players on the roster,  we certainly could have all the ingredients needed to write an episode or six.

Embarrassments?  Keith Ballard swinging his stick and whacking goaltender Tomas Vokoun in the head after Vokoun was scored on with Ballard standing.  Watching.

Tomfoolery?  Ballard again trying to swipe a puck away from the net with a baseball type swing, only to have the puck go directly under Vokoun’s pad and into the Panther net.  Now these two are getting along about as well as George and Newman! 

Life’s escapades?  Dennis Seidenberg breaking the leg of Nathan Horton on an attempted dump in.  Horton goes on to miss 17 games.  Seidenberg ultimately gets traded for a draft pick. 

While we have a long way to go to top the lunatic behavior of Kramer, or the eccentric behavior and violent tempers of Frank and Estelle Costanza, one has to wonder.  Are we ever going to be the master of our domain?

Is someone going to take the Elaine Benes role that she so perfected and make that forceful shove while yelling “get out” at the same time?

What schemes are the scouting staff up to that continue to fail?  Like Kramer’s idea about having coffee table books about coffee tables, or when he and Frank Costanza went into business together to design the bra for men called “The Bro” or as Frank suggested  “The Manssiere“?

And of course we have George, or as he sometimes called himself Art Vandelay, who appears to be the closest thing to Randy Sexton.  Seemingly concocting stories about how good our players are and how happy we are with our roster.

I could go on, but time is not allowing me.

So, as this blogger watches other teams who failed to make the playoffs make moves (Atlanta, Tampa, Edmonton,Columbus, and now New Jersey) either in management and or staff or coaching, we sit and do nothing.

We haven’t made the playoffs for nine consecutive seasons.  10 if you count the lockout.  We’ve squandered draft picks, made lousy contract decisions, poor trades, even worse free agent signings and still, what’s happening?  Nothing.

The local papers-Nothing.

The local reporters blogs-nothing.

The Florida Panthers website-Nothing, except a little self promotion of Sunrise Sports and Entertainment.  I especially like the part about the new motto, Accessibility, Accountability, and Winning Culture.  And let’s not forget the part about the most diverse entertainment schedule in the business with shows from Bon Jovi, Jay-Z and more! 

Fluff.  Let’s not kid ourselves, we want news about Hockey.  I could give a crap about what concerts are coming here, but it’s becoming plainly obvious that the entertainment side of this gig is running and supporting the hockey side of things.  Blech!

So short of me having heard from my season ticket rep, thank you (I’ll keep her name private), I have nothing to report.  I’m trying to find something to tell you, and something that will give you hope and excitement.

Apoligies.  This is alot like Mr. Peterman going on an exotic vacation to Burma looking for unique clothing.

So for those of you that are looking for info and for something to be reported, I’m sorry to say:

“No soup for you”!

Thanks for reading.

Your comments are always welcomed and appreciated.


Follow me on Twitter @TheRatTrick 

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Tags: Florida Panthers Master Of Your Domain No Soup For You Seinfeld

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